Awe and Wonder 1.1.26 – A New Year Suggestion

As 2025 fades into our rearview mirror and we look forward with hopeful anticipation to what 2026 will bring, I offer up the following advice. Bring more awe and wonder into your life.

Because our grandchildren’s parents were working on New Years Eve, Elizabeth and I were asked to watch our grandchildren yesterday morning. So, we left our house at the lake at 6:30 a.m. to drive to their house an hour away near Charlottesville. As a result, Elizabeth and I had “the opportunity” to spend the morning of New Years Eve alone with our grandchildren, James and Elizabeth. 

Looking back, spending time with James and Elizabeth on New Years Eve was special. As I told their parents via text this morning, one of James and Elizabeth’s greatest gifts to me is bringing awe and a sense of wonder back into my life.  Let’s face it, as adults, we lose the ability to play make believe and we lose our sense of curiosity. This in turns makes us less creative, less connected to nature and to others, and quite frankly, more anxious and lonelier.

So how do the emotions of awe and wonder inspire curiosity and a deeper appreciation for the world around us?  A quote from AI – “Awe and wonder are transformative emotions that can produce personal growth, creativity, and our sense of connection to something greater.”  Maybe that is why children are so malleable and learn so quickly.  A colleague of mine recommended a book several years ago titled “Happiness Is a Choice.”  The book’s main premise is that we choose whether to be happy.  In other words, if happiness is an emotion, we can choose to develop that mindset or choose the opposite.  I now believe that the same is true with the emotions of awe and wonder.  We can choose to embrace and develop these emotions, or we can choose the opposite. 

As I played “make believe” with James and Elizabeth the morning of New Years Eve, Elizabeth put on a shawl and decided that she was Mary, the mother of Jesus.  During this playtime, I would take on various roles including Jesus, Joseph, a donkey and a camel.  Elizabeth’s brother James, who is five years old, played a donkey and a camel.  And their two dogs, Oden and Boston were either camels or donkeys.  Donkeys and camels seemed to be central figures in this story – not sure why, but I went along.  During our “Play”, Mary decided that she was going to carry Jesus with her on a “hike.” So, how did a two-year-old carry a 165-pound person? Well, it happened because anything is possible in “make believe”.  Let’s just say that Jesus followed Mary all around the house.  And that is how she carried Jesus everywhere. Someday, my granddaughter may carry me in other ways.

Now, let me be clear.  My ability to participate in these “stories” was not always there.  In the past, I would decline to be a participant and would just watch.  And when I did reluctantly become a participant, I was not fully engaged.  It is kind of like dancing.  When you are self-conscious and know you are not a good dancer, you will never lose yourself in the music and let go.  However, if you can lose yourself in the music and let go, you feel the wonder and awe of the moment and you lose yourself – and you feel alive and pure.  This happened to me during a Cold Play concert in Amsterdam when I was surrounded by thousands of Dutch on the floor of the stadium and I lost myself in a communal moment – hugging complete strangers, all of us drenched in sweat.  

Throughout the ages, music has been central to every culture, creating communal moments.  And I believe that this was one way of building a sense of community – an evolutionary trait that allowed our species to feel something bigger than ourselves.  And to this day we still desire to a part of something bigger than ourselves. 

In addition to music, sports can produce a sense of awe.  There were two things that I did while working 70 hours a week as an investment banker that helped me keep my sanity.  I would leave work early once a week to play basketball at the local JCC and I would play basketball on Thursday nights and Saturday mornings with my neighborhood buddies. I can remember playing basketball and losing myself on the court – losing myself in the moment so often that I could not remember shots I took during the game. 

And I would also go on runs after work or early in the morning before work.  Basketball and running, communal and solitary activities respectively, allowed me to lose myself or be “outside of myself.”  This was a very healthy way for me to escape.  And I truly believe that there are many ways that we can lose ourselves – through walking, gardening, even pickle ball!  By embracing awe during these activities we escape into a world of mystery and wonder.  And it allows our brain to hit “the reset button.”

I have told people many times that I did not run for the physical benefits.  I ran for the mental benefits. There is science to back this up.  There is something called the vagus nerve, which is the largest bundle of nerves in our body, that controls our heart rate, our breathing, our digestion.  In other words, our entire microbiome.  And studies have found that people with more active vagus nerves do better in life.  And that this vagus nerve gets activated when we have moments of awe.  And having moments of awe also quiets our inflammation response, which is key to staying healthy.

We know that in addition to running, walking can be healthy.  But to really understand why walking is healthy, a study was completed with two set of walkers.  The first group was told to take “Awe Walks.”  They were told to go out with a sense of childlike wonder and to admire the things around you, including flowers, shadows, the horizon, the sky, etc.  The second group, the control group was told to go out and take vigorous walks.  When asked to draw pictures of themselves after eight weeks, the awe group drew pictures of themselves off to the side with the focus of the pictures being nature.  The control group continued to have themselves as the center of the picture.  The awe group reported that their walks felt richer and deeper as the study continued.  In other words, being purposeful in your approach to awe created even more awe.  And after eight weeks, the awe group reported much less anxiety than the control group. 

We know that serving others creates a sense of well-being because it takes the focus off yourself, creating less anxiety.  This recent research on awe supports the belief that practicing awe and wonder does the same thing.  So, in summary, slowing down and seeing the beauty of our world and the beauty in other people allows us to get away from ourselves.  To do this, we need to approach people, situations, and the world with a sense of wonder and curiosity, allowing us to experience awe.  And awe activates our vagus nerve, creating healthier breathing, blood pressure and gut health.  But more importantly, approaching the world with a sense of wonder and awe creates absolute joy.

There are so many examples of moments of awe and wonder.  Maybe that is why many of us love thunderstorms, a first snow fall, a full moon, and sunrises. I am awestruck by these natural occurrences. But here is the secret. We do not need these natural occurrences to be awestruck. We can be awestruck by little things.  We just need to appreciate all the small miracles that happen every day.  And some of those miracles are things that people do around us.  A word for this is “Moral Beauty”.  When a person helps another in some way, we are inspired to do the same – to be better people.  That feeling of inspiration is an awe moment because we have experienced moral beauty.   

I now fully embrace playing “make believe” with my grandchildren and letting myself go.  And it is an amazing feeling to be in the moment “with them.”  And they know it.  They know when you are fully in the moment with them.  They can see it in your eyes and your expression.  And YOU do this thinking that you are giving them the gift.  When, in reality, it is they that are giving you the gift.  Maybe that is why watching “Polar Express” resonated with me this year.  I now hear the bells again.

My hope for each of you is that you allow yourself to hear the bells again.  May wonder and awe permeate your 2026.

May every sunrise bring you hope and may every sunset bring you peace.

Papa J